Neighbors at Oak Crest Senior Living in Parkville, Maryland, share a meal together. Living in a retirement community can make it easier to maintain social connections. Photo courtesy of Erickson Senior Living

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LouAnn and Howard Rau didn’t plan on moving into a retirement home until their later years, but after a visit to Oak Crest Senior Living in Parkville, Maryland, that included a hilarious presentation on downsizing and a dinner of steak and lobster, the two of them decided not to put it off any longer. The couple, now 72 and 69, made the move last summer.

“We were coming here, and then it was like, ‘Why are we waiting?’” said Howard Rau. “‘Why don’t we do it now?’ And boom, we just did it. [We decided] not to wait until you’re 80 and 90 to move in — come on in when you’re on the younger side, and live a little.”

The desire to “live a little” is one that runs in LouAnn Rau’s family. Both of her parents spent their final years at Oak Crest, and her mother, in particular, made the most of it. In fact, her mother organized and held a gala with other residents for more than 20 years.

“She said, ‘Sometimes I get the feeling that they think we came here to die, but we came here to live,’” LouAnn Rau said. “So it is your mindset also. And when my dad did pass away, [my mother] had so many friends, and she was still very much involved in things that she enjoyed her life.”

The Raus are in the minority: 60% of older Americans prefer to age at home, while just 19% would like to move into a nursing home or assisted living facility, according to a study from the Pew Research Center.

Yet living at home can be isolating, particularly if driving becomes cumbersome. Loneliness has been found to accelerate aging and exacerbate health conditions.

On the other hand, the Baltimore area has dozens of retirement communities, some decades old, like Charlestown in Catonsville and Pickersgill in Towson, founded in 1802. More are being constructed, like The Gallery at Roland Park, scheduled to open next year.

Activities at Oak Crest

All of these communities provide a full slate of activities and events for their residents. At Oak Crest, LouAnn and Howard Rau both play pickleball; Howard works at the TV studio; and LouAnn takes exercise classes. They’ve both taken part in a pickleball Christmas party and have organized a watch party with other residents for an upcoming pickleball movie, The Dink.

“It’s community to the max, and people helping people and just enjoying being with them,” LouAnn Rau said.

Andrew Lingelbach, fitness manager at Oak Crest, is one of the staff members most responsible for organizing these activities, getting residents involved and helping them to build community. Lingelbach leads a staff of four who help Oak Crest residents safely stay active and moving.

Lingelbach used to work in the commercial fitness industry, where he enjoyed working with older adults most. When he saw a position at Oak Crest, Lingelbach leaped at the opportunity.

“I thought, ‘Oh man, I could just work with them all day long,’” he said. “It’s like having an ice cream sundae for dessert every day.”

Lingelbach said that he particularly likes working with seniors because he enjoys helping them find “day-to-day functionality and interpersonal connections.”

With that in mind, he tries to come up with programs that will be exciting and fun to residents that have exercised their whole lives and to residents who may not have exercised at all — programs like a boot camp-style workout followed by a happy hour.

“Just because people get older doesn’t mean they [should] stop having fun and trying new things and doing something different,” he said.

Get involved

Connecting with people and getting out of your apartment, according to LouAnn Rau, is “critical” to having a positive experience at a senior living community. Having spent 25 years as a homecare nurse, Rau saw how loneliness affects seniors’ health.

“You do have to leave your apartment and get to meet people so that they can surround you with love,” she said.

Fortunately, Rau has had no trouble getting to know her fellow residents as well as Oak Crest’s friendly employees. She wonders if staff had been trained at the “Chick-fil-A school of customer service,” she joked.

“It’s just that nice of a place to live, and you can’t fake that stuff,” Rau said.

Ultimately, she said, enjoying life at Oak Crest comes by choosing to make the most of it.

“We’ve embraced the lifestyle, because you can’t put this on anybody else,” Rau said.

“You have to be responsible for yourself, too. If you don’t get out of your apartment, you’re not going to [meet] anybody to have fun with. So, we’ve chosen to take the high road on that, and we’ve got lots of friends. We’re doing lots of fun things.”