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Q: I told my sister my boyfriend recently brought up the M-word (marriage), and she asked if he also brought up getting a prenup. He didn’t; should he have? We met a few years ago after going through rough divorces and both swore we’d never get married again. I think my sister has a lot more money than I do, if that makes any difference. She’s a widow. —Deborah Anne, Virginia

A: Exciting news about the M-word conversation, Deborah Anne, especially considering it once was a loaded word for you and your boyfriend. It seems like you have a lot more talking to do, and yes, at some point you both should ponder the P-word: prenup.

A prenuptial agreement is a legally binding contract that enables couples to spell out how and to whom they want their assets distributed when the marriage ends in death or divorce.

When I was younger and married, I thought prenups were only for wealthy people, and usually to protect the family money from perceived gold-diggers. (Wasn’t this the plotline of an “LA Law” episode?)

Now that I’m older, divorced and back in the dating pool, I’ve decided if I ever walk down the aisle again, I’ll have a prenup in place. It’s not because I’m wealthy but because I have two grown kids and a house I’d like them to inherit.

Legally, spouses trump children unless there’s something in writing to indicate otherwise. If you have assets you’d like to pass on to your children or grandchildren, you’ll likely want a prenup.

Laurie Israel is an attorney and mediator based in Massachusetts, and she’s become a nationally recognized expert on prenups and post-nups. She’s also the author of three books on the topic: The Generous Prenup, The Marriage-Friendly Prenup and Mediating Prenups.

I talked with Israel for a Dating While Gray podcast episode. She told me that despite her credentials, “I’m not necessarily a pro-prenup person. And for young couples just starting out in their careers and who aren’t bringing children or significant assets to the marriage, a prenup probably isn’t needed. But I think for second marriages, they can be extremely useful.”

Israel added that “when people get married late in life, there’s kind of a delicate issue about how the children will feel about your marriage, especially if you’re going to marry somebody younger. Not that you’d necessarily involve [kids] in the [prenup crafting] ahead of time. But you may want to assure them, ‘I’ve thought about you.’”

I asked followers of the Dating While Gray Facebook page if anyone had an experience with a prenup they wanted to share.

Liz, who lives in Florida, said she and her partner, Mike, negotiated a cohabitation agreement when they moved in together. They’re leaning toward marriage and if they finally decide to walk down the aisle, they’ll turn the prenup into a post-nup.

“The purpose of the agreement is to define what’s his/mine/ours, protect our individual estates for our children, and ensure that in the event of death or a disability requiring a move to a care facility, the remaining partner can stay in the house as long as they want to, even until death,” Liz said.

“That was necessary, because we bought the house as joint tenants in common,” Liz added, “meaning we each retain ownership of our 50% of the house. That equity becomes part of our individual estates upon our deaths.”

Fortunately, Liz said, “figuring this stuff out was remarkably easy for us, compared to similar decisions I made in my first marriage. It’s one more sign that I have a good partner in Mike.”

Susan in California also responded to the Facebook page callout. She and her partner, Mark, “updated our trusts to protect and take care of each other. We talked about a prenup and then decided to have a marriage ceremony and reception but not sign the documents to become legally married.”

“With his business and disabled son, it’s easier this way,” Susan added. “We get to celebrate our love and commitment without any potential financial complications down the road.”

Laura Stassi is host of the podcast Dating While Gray: The Grown-Up’s Guide to Love, Sex and Relationships and author of Romance Redux: Finding Love in Your Later Years. Send your questions to Laura at newloveafter50@gmail.com.