How to find balance this holiday season
Photo by Josh Harrison | Unsplash.com
As autumn progresses toward winter and the holiday seasons approach, many people in Howard County look forward to traditions that warm the heart: family gatherings, festive meals and the joy of reconnecting with loved ones.
Yet while the holidays bring moments of light, they also come with challenges — especially for those navigating grief, changes in family roles or the quieter realities of aging.
For older adults in particular, the season can stir deep memories. A familiar song may remind us of those no longer at the table. Busy schedules and crowded stores can feel overwhelming rather than energizing. And sometimes, expectations — our own or others’ — leave us stretched thin.
Still, there are ways to embrace both the joys and the challenges. A few simple practices can help:
• Keep traditions, but adapt them. If hosting a large meal feels daunting, consider a smaller potluck or gathering at a local restaurant. The connection matters more than perfection.
• Honor those we miss. Lighting a candle, displaying photos, or telling stories can make absent loved ones part of the celebration.
• Step away from the holidays. Perhaps planning a trip away for the holidays this year is just the escape you need. A sunny beach or a new environment where relaxation and fun are the primary goals can serve as a distraction from the blues that a recurring holiday tradition might evoke.
• Reach out. Loneliness can weigh heavily this time of year. Calling a neighbor, joining a faith service, or participating in a community group can renew a sense of belonging.
• Be there for others. Recent research suggests that helping others benefits helpers by boosting their happiness, reducing stress, and increasing life satisfaction.
Practice special acts of kindness, such as writing anonymous thank-you notes, leaving encouraging messages in public spaces, or sharing a kind thought with the clerks and office workers you encounter (or just hand them a mini chocolate bar).
• Give yourself permission to rest. The holidays do not need to be a marathon. Quiet moments — walking down Main Street in Ellicott City, enjoying the Symphony of Lights at Merriweather, or simply savoring a cup of tea — are part of the season’s gift.
The holidays can remind us that family, friendship and community are what endure. As we move through the often hectic weeks ahead, let’s allow joy and tenderness to sit side by side, trusting that even in the busiest season, there is space for peace.
Dr. Tom Swisher is the author of Family Dynamics: Transforming the Hidden Patterns That Shape Us, available on Amazon. He is a professor emeritus in Stevenson University’s Counseling & Human Services Department and maintains a private practice in Ellicott City, Maryland.
